Staying Positive

[Will Edwards]

Having unclear objectives or unrealistic expectations are sure-fire ways of sabotaging your goal-achieving, but so too are lack of self-belief, fear of failure and lack of motivation. If you have defined your goals properly using the SMART procedure, they should indeed be clear and realistic. However, I would like to consider the importance of staying positive in relation to goal-achieving.

Sometimes, in my workshops, I ask people if they are optimists or pessimists. Generally, what happens is that the optimists will happily reveal themselves, but the pessimists are usually a little more reticent; indeed, often preferring to use the term ‘realist’ rather than ‘pessimist’. I think this is completely understandable: no one, to my knowledge, has ever written a book on the subject of the power of negative thinking; but, by contrast, there are very many books on the market that deal with the power of positive thinking.

Every attitude of mind we take – and optimism and pessimism are exactly that – is a choice that we make; even if it does not feel like we are making a choice. But, after years of habitually adopting a pessimistic mindset, it can be hard to dump this habit in favour of adopting the new, empowering habit of optimism. Why? Because, pessimists have good reason – or perhaps we should say justification - for being pessimistic. Pessimists simply believe they are generally right – things don’t usually go their way.

Of course, optimists believe exactly the same thing – things do generally go right for optimists. Both optimists and pessimists and making use of exactly the same principle to attract outcomes into their lives. It cuts both ways: you can indeed attract both good and bad outcomes through your attitude; and that’s why it is so important to try to foster a positive outlook on life.

There are many ways to do this, but one we will briefly consider here is the use of affirmation. An affirmation is a sentence that declares something to be true. Generally such sentences begin with the words ‘I am’ for example: I am calm; I am confident; I am in control. If you are a pessimist, try to open your mind to the possibility of change; and then try making use of positive affirmations like these.

All you need do is repeatedly say the sentence to yourself. Try this three times per day; and on each occasion, say each affirmation three times with purpose. It may sound silly or even ridiculous, but such words have the power to change our attitudes and the outcomes we attract into our lives are, to a very great extent, a product of attitude.

Finally, even if you are an optimistic person, you should still practice using affirmations. Even optimists don’t always manage to stay positive. We all lose sight of our self-belief and motivation from time to time and have to sometimes contend with the fear of failure too. So remember to make use of this very powerful technique to help you to stay positive – it is a vital ingredient for achieving those important goals.

[Kevin Potts]

Hi Mike,

Strikes a chord with those who follow and perhaps use CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy).

The key is identifying what is IRRATIONAL in your thinking patterns and take responsible for changing these to RATIONAL thought patterns...

....Easier said than done.....but it is a key...

Kevin

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[Helpful]

I believe there is something to do with the Law of Attraction, but it is hard to get the discipline to keep it up (especially when you had a bad day), but I think it does work. IMHO

[Ditas]

Good post. I am an optimist but my husband is a pessimist and his negative energy sometimes overpowers my positive spirit. I have read the book " the secret" ( law of attraction) and I believe it really works if put into practice. :-)

[wbindia]

Having unclear objectives or unrealistic expectations are sure-fire ways of sabotaging your goal-achieving, but so too are lack of self-belief, fear of failure and lack of motivation. If you have defined your goals properly using the SMART procedure, they should indeed be clear and realistic. However, I would like to consider the importance of staying positive in relation to goal-achieving.

Sometimes, in my workshops, I ask people if they are optimists or pessimists. Generally, what happens is that the optimists will happily reveal themselves, but the pessimists are usually a little more reticent; indeed, often preferring to use the term ‘realist’ rather than ‘pessimist’. I think this is completely understandable: no one, to my knowledge, has ever written a book on the subject of the power of negative thinking; but, by contrast, there are very many books on the market that deal with the power of positive thinking.

Every attitude of mind we take – and optimism and pessimism are exactly that – is a choice that we make; even if it does not feel like we are making a choice. But, after years of habitually adopting a pessimistic mindset, it can be hard to dump this habit in favour of adopting the new, empowering habit of optimism. Why? Because, pessimists have good reason – or perhaps we should say justification - for being pessimistic. Pessimists simply believe they are generally right – things don’t usually go their way.

Of course, optimists believe exactly the same thing – things do generally go right for optimists. Both optimists and pessimists and making use of exactly the same principle to attract outcomes into their lives. It cuts both ways: you can indeed attract both good and bad outcomes through your attitude; and that’s why it is so important to try to foster a positive outlook on life.

There are many ways to do this, but one we will briefly consider here is the use of affirmation. An affirmation is a sentence that declares something to be true. Generally such sentences begin with the words ‘I am’ for example: I am calm; I am confident; I am in control. If you are a pessimist, try to open your mind to the possibility of change; and then try making use of positive affirmations like these.

All you need do is repeatedly say the sentence to yourself. Try this three times per day; and on each occasion, say each affirmation three times with purpose. It may sound silly or even ridiculous, but such words have the power to change our attitudes and the outcomes we attract into our lives are, to a very great extent, a product of attitude.

Finally, even if you are an optimistic person, you should still practice using affirmations. Even optimists don’t always manage to stay positive. We all lose sight of our self-belief and motivation from time to time and have to sometimes contend with the fear of failure too. So remember to make use of this very powerful technique to help you to stay positive – it is a vital ingredient for achieving those important goals.

Will Edwards-

Good post, I however would add one additional point to your message; staying positive will not work unless you learn to develop and harness the faith and belief in staying positive. I have been mentoring/coaching for 10 years now. As a Christian beleiver in the Lord God Himself, my faith and bellief is as real and powerful as the PC I am using and is an integral part of who I am as a person.

I'm not trying to twist yours or others' arms into accepting and embracing my Chrisitan faith, only to openly recognize
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that apart from one's faith and belief in yourself and in God that you will actually accomplish what you set out to do, just having a positive attitude is not enough unless you develop the faith and belief that you will overcome and accomplish your personal/professional goals in life.

If you believe it you can achieve it, conversely if you don't believe you WILL, more likely than not you WON'T.

Best-

Wayne


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[Kevin Potts]

Yep have to agree with that Cognition piece - the way you think, deterimines the way your feel which delivers so often the way you end up living.

Kevin

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[starlightangel]

The problem is with affirmations is that unless you are really disciplined, you tend to forget to do them on a daily basis. If only I could do them automatically each day without thinking about it, I know that it would be beneficial. My head is always full of so much stuff. Perhaps if I could find the time or should I say make the time to meditate, this would slow down my mind and I could then concentrate on the important stuff ie affirmations!

Bet a lot of people feel like this too. The trouble is we are all rushing here, rushing there, filling our minds with endless tasks and thoughts, we forget to stop and live in the moment.
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Lets all make the effort and positivity will surely follow.

Kind Regards
Karen

[laurencewins]

Toilet doors and refrigerators are 2 great places to stick positive affirmations up. You see them constantly and they're visual reminders.

Also, it IS OK to have a "bad day." Give yourself permission to have it and then focus again the next day. Nobody remains positive all the time because we are all human.
Also, without bad days, you can't properly cherish the great ones.

[Douglas J Gregory]

I completely understand the world of not staying positive but what i have recently found what works for staying positive is not being by yourself. IM can be a lonely place especially if your family and friends knock you down and tell you this is imposssible.
Stay away from the negative and stay with the positive.
This forum has all it takes to stay positive!
Also, set realistic goals.
There is no get rich methods out there and if there is , its purely n=by chance.
Stay tuned into someone you trust. Learn to work with and as a team. Look for the positive and stick by the ones that are.
Setting goals and keeping things realistic are some sure foire ways to stay positive.
Take action daily and if not daily, write, read, surround yourself with positive.
People will knock you off your post every chance they get if you let them , know that you are awesome, you are the greatest and yo most definately know you can and will succeed if you allow yourself to!

Keep coming around here. I have found this forum to be just what the doctor ordered and I was fighting to stay positive for a long time........Now, I practice what I preach and surround myself with others that do the same.
You are a new perosn and can do anything you set your mind to.

Don't set the bar too high but do , do something to better yourself everyday

Take action and success will follow!

Your friend in success,
Douglas J Gregory
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[acquiesce]

Hi Will,

Great post. I absolutely agree that a lot of people have or set themselves un realistic goals. Most of them also lack self belief. It’s a vicious circle.

Rich

[Will Edwards]

Will Edwards-

Good post, I however would add one additional point to your message; staying positive will not work unless you learn to develop and harness the faith and belief in staying positive. I have been mentoring/coaching for 10 years now. As a Christian beleiver in the Lord God Himself, my faith and bellief is as real and powerful as the PC I am using and is an integral part of who I am as a person.

I'm not trying to twist yours or others' arms into accepting and embracing my Chrisitan faith, only to openly recognize
To view links or images in this forum your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
that apart from one's faith and belief in yourself and in God that you will actually accomplish what you set out to do, just having a positive attitude is not enough unless you develop the faith and belief that you will overcome and accomplish your personal/professional goals in life.

If you believe it you can achieve it, conversely if you don't believe you WILL, more likely than not you WON'T.

Hi Wayne

Thanks for your comment about the importance of faith. I believe that faith is also an important component of success. In fact, you may wish to read my book the 7 Keys to Success for a bit more about the subject. You can get a free copy here ...


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Cheers

Will
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[jknightx]

I have to admit ,I do get very negative with this Internet business due to my frustration.I am positive about most things, but this is so very discouraging at times. But I guess got to taking my lumps till I get it right.

[Mark Nicholson]

Affirmations are great in themselves; I am a trained hypnotherapist and have been in practice on and off for 8 years. I believe affirmations are best used and get faster results if they are used in self-hypnosis

[jknightx]

To be honests a few years back I did the whole "law of attraction" ,Affirmations and placing wish boards all over the house(even had a program on my laptop running that would quickly flash affirmations every few seconds) but it just did not seem to work for me ,so after nearly a year I stopped all the affirmations,and took the program off my comp.

[Gary Smith]

To be honests a few years back I did the whole "law of attraction" ,Affirmations and placing wish boards all over the house(even had a program on my laptop running that would quickly flash affirmations every few seconds) but it just did not seem to work for me ,so after nearly a year I stopped all the affirmations,and took the program off my comp.

Jim Rohn used to say that 'affirmation without action is the beginning of delusion'. Affirmations are a powerful tool if you back them up with some actions. I also read 'The Secret' which is all about the law of attraction and I believe that it works because it opens your mind to things you may not have otherwise seen.

It's like the old saying ... 'when the student is ready the teacher will appear'. I think that's correct but rather than the teacher magically appearing I think it's more a case of 'when the student is ready he/she will recognise the teacher'. To me, that's the power of 'the secret' and the law of attraction. The realisation that you can have a much more abundant life than you have had up until now. Once you realise what's possible and start taking action it changes your entire playing field and opens up a whole host of opportunities that you wouldn't have otherwise seen or recognised.

Another good example of 'realisation' is when you hear someone mention a (not famous) persons name, a place you've never heard of or a word you've never heard before. You often find that in future weeks and months you hear that same name, place or word and it seems kind of odd that after hearing, or more importantly *noticing* it that first time, it's suddenly popping up quite regularly.

Maybe I'm wrong - I know nothing about psychology or the way the mind works but what I've said just makes sense to me.

[laurencewins]

'when the student is ready he/she will recognise the teacher'

Another good example of 'realisation' is when you hear someone mention a (not famous) persons name, a place you've never heard of or a word you've never heard before. You often find that in future weeks and months you hear that same name, place or word and it seems kind of odd that after hearing, or more importantly *noticing* it that first time, it's suddenly popping up quite regularly.

I agree with these statements wholeheartedly. They both happen frequently and it is up to us to notice.

There is another wise saying that goes .. When opportunity knocks on your door you should be ready to open it. Sadly, some people are standing at the window when it happens.

Life is an enigma and we should embrace it with every fibre of our being. We only get one shot at it.

[starlightangel]

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To be honest, I did the same thing watching flashing affirmations on my computer and I have got to admit since using these affirmations, I am feeling a lot more positive and I am sticking to working online with one programme! So that in itself is a revelation for me because up until now I have joined that many different programmes and not stuck to any of them. We are all searching to be happy and content and I really think you should never give up. Our life is a journey and you may find that one day you will be more receptive to affirmations and law of attraction. I am not an expert but the positive things that are happening to me at the moment I think are happening because I am ready. Sometimes subconsciously you may not feel it is the right time to move forward and accept changes, therefore you sabotage any efforts for obtaining happiness on a subconscious level. This is my experience anyway. Maybe this was the same for you.

[starlightangel]

Hiya, just thought I would let you know that your links are not working in your signature.

[jknightx]

Jim Rohn used to say that 'affirmation without action is the beginning of delusion'. Affirmations are a powerful tool if you back them up with some actions. I also read 'The Secret' which is all about the law of attraction and I believe that it works because it opens your mind to things you may not have otherwise seen.

It's like the old saying ... 'when the student is ready the teacher will appear'. I think that's correct but rather than the teacher magically appearing I think it's more a case of 'when the student is ready he/she will recognise the teacher'. To me, that's the power of 'the secret' and the law of attraction. The realisation that you can have a much more abundant life than you have had up until now. Once you realise what's possible and start taking action it changes your entire playing field and opens up a whole host of opportunities that you wouldn't have otherwise seen or recognised.

Another good example of 'realisation' is when you hear someone mention a (not famous) persons name, a place you've never heard of or a word you've never heard before. You often find that in future weeks and months you hear that same name, place or word and it seems kind of odd that after hearing, or more importantly *noticing* it that first time, it's suddenly popping up quite regularly.

Maybe I'm wrong - I know nothing about psychology or the way the mind works but what I've said just makes sense to me.

Yes that was my take of it all, after all the law of attraction stff and the seceret I just started to concentrate on trying to learn then try to do .sometimes I get it right and a lot of times I get it wrong,but in the end at least I do get somethings right and move very slowly forward.

[laurencewins]

hey Karen,

whose links??